I wish I had some Zofran right now. I want to puke.
I barely slept last night. I don’t know how I’m going to make it for the next 11 hours. Ugh
Anonymous said: If I only do incalls at an upscale hotel. Do I really have to switch hotels if it's once a week? Can I stay with the same hotel or is it risky? I'm just comfortable with this hotel and it's gorgeous upscale 5 star.
Well I personally wouldn’t feel comfortable at a hotel more than once per week. That being said, if you’re only seeing one client a day, it may not be a big deal. If you’re seeing way more, it’s risky. Typically higher end hotels don’t want to compromise your business but if you’re doing something way out of the ordinary, they might not think twice.
I think I know why I feel this way. I think it’s a conglomeration of multiple things. They happened slowly throughout the month so maybe that’s why I didn’t notice one thing as a trigger.
I had two family weddings this month. On top of that my best friend (who is the only person besides Korean who knows what I do) and her husband are having troubles. Add that together with the move and new job….
I don’t know. I guess I feel sad because I moved all by myself. I’m so used to doing everything by myself. Sometimes I wish there was just someone there to help. I’ve always prided myself on how strong I am. But over time, I just feel worn down.
On top of that, the situation with Korean. We’ve been together a year now. I live in this constant fear that he’ll change his mind. I let him go the first time because I understood the dilemma. Then he came back and we were barreling towards a happy ending. A certain event led us to separate very briefly but we were like magnets, pulling together.
Sometimes I get so angry I could scream. That I waited my whole life for this love and the situation is so fucked up. It’s like nothing can ever be easy. That everything in my life must end in hurt.
I feel at times his hesitancy. And I worry he’ll break my heart. I’ve only been in love twice and the first time, it was stupid, naive, young love. This time, I do not know if I can survive it. That if it ends and all my dreams are destroyed, then I could not bear to go on alone, on that thin hope that someone else might appear.
I don’t know why I’m feeling like this. I’ve been feeling really depressed the past few days. I’ve just been randomly crying for absolutely no reason. I feel like I should be happy, I moved to a place that’s better for me personally and professionally. I have a great new job.
But I feel like shit. When I sleep, I just have nightmares. I wake up almost hourly. I’ve been randomly crying. And probably most concerning to me is last night I thought about killing myself. I don’t think I’d actually ever do it but I definitely know how I’d do it. I get stuck on it, I just think of it over and over in my mind.
So to get rid of the thoughts, I just tried to obliterate myself on wine, which is not really good either. Maybe once I start work tomorrow, it’ll go away. I don’t know. I hate feeling this way and it’s been a really long time since I felt it.
I was on Effexor for a long time, like 5 years. I weaned myself off and have been without it for 8 years. I sometimes get a little sad but usually I have a trigger of some sort. This is just….different.
Anonymous said: In your opinion and experience, what are your feelings on "size". Obviously professionally is different from personally. Do you personally prefer someone who can fill a magnum or a "average" guy?
I personally like a normal sized gentleman. Probably 6-6.5 inches is perfect for me. I have anatomy that is a bit out of the ordinary, I have a retroverted uterus which means my uterus faces backwards. This in turn causes one side of my cervix to sit lower. So larger gentlemen can easily bump my cervix and it is terribly painful. Like I’ve literally screamed before because it was so bad.
I also feel like a lot of guys with large penises have this syndrome I like to call “huge cock syndrome”. Because they have a large penis, he believes he needs no technique to satisfy a lady. That his big cock is so awesome that he can just thrust away. I’d rather have a guy who has some technique and has some space to move.
Anonymous said: Have you ever thought of providing from your home?
Yes, I have done appointments at my old apartment but those were few and far between. I told myself I would not do any appointments at my new apartment but I don’t know if I’m going to be able to hold true to that. Sometimes it’s just more convenient. Obviously I would never invite a new client over.
Hotel costs, especially during the week, can be insane. So if it’s someone I’ve seen three or four times, it’s easier to just have him come over. I do have two bedrooms, one main bedroom and one guest bedroom.
Anonymous said: I forgot her URL but she's a really succesful black escort whose just been to Dubai and just bought a Hermes bag. I'm asking because I feel like you would know :/
Anonymous said: How do you get clients to extend there appointments with you? What are your tricks??
I don’t usually get my appointments extended. I think this is an agency based phenomenon (someone correct me if I’m wrong). Most independent escorts get pissy about extending because we may have another client coming and we need time to get ready. It’s kind of expected that clients will book for the time they ask for.
Anonymous said: Excuse me if this isn't the kind of question you would normally answer but if a client asked you for a full week of your time, what would you say and how would you find a number appropriate for that allotted amount of time? Do you have a personal system? What are the factors that you consider before finalizing your decision? Sorry if this seems all over the place but yes, i do ask for personal reasons.
Well I did a 3 day appointment once. That was the longest appointment I’ve ever done. I based my donation off my overnight fee. So I guess what I’d do is multiply my overnight by seven then knock off a few grand for a volume discount.
Obviously, a week could be difficult depending on certain factors in your life. But I think I would not do a week unless I knew the client already. It can be painful with certain clients, you just want to be done. I can’t imagine feeling like that for a week :/
I’d also specify certain times as “alone time”. You’ll both need a break from one another.